Confidence is Key

What happens when you go for the handshake and they go for the hug? What happens when you turn a friendly thumbs up into an unwelcome fist bump? How do you respond when you say hi to someone who looks away and doesn’t hear you say hi? Do you turn and run? Do you lower yourself into a pit of embarrassment? Do you laugh yourself off the face of the earth? No! You love yourself! You tell yourself you are good, and it’s all good.

All of the above scenarios have happened to me. No, not only in the distant past, but also this week. It’s pretty great. I am an extremely awkward person. I have no shortage of embarrassing encounters. Do I let them run my life? No. Instead, I tell myself that I love myself and that it’s fine. It’s fiiiinnnne. It’s FINE. I’m great and fine. Yes, I do make myself cringe, but don’t we all? I try really hard not to let these cringe-worthy moments run my life.

When I feel the air in the room turn uncomfortable and realize the error of ways, I don’t cower down; I stand up. I give a light laugh, a brilliant smile, and sometimes a slight shrug of the shoulders. I realize that it is just who I am. I was born this way. I won’t change anything by beating myself up. Besides, sometime someone is going to find me totally endearing, awkwardness and all. When that day comes, I will be eternally grateful that I didn’t compromise myself to look cooler. Besides, I look pretty darn cool to myself a lot of the time. Doesn’t that count for something?

I make really amazing jokes, like Chandler from Friends level stuff. Other people may look at me with blank stares or look the other way and not acknowledge my poor attempt at comedy, but I make myself laugh. I get a kick out of myself. To me, that is a great way to live. Also, I’m being myself, so people have to at least admire the authenticity, right?

I’m writing this to say that it happens to all of us. Take it from someone whose face, at the first sign of embarrassment, used to turn bright red like a cherry tomato. I could feel that my face was hot; I knew it was red, yet people still felt the need to tell me my face was red. That only added to the red until it got deeper and darker. I have gotten a lot better since then. I have grown up a little and owned my red face. Yes, it still gets red sometimes, but I try my best to ignore it and keep living my life. I have always been jealous of people who did not have to worry about having their embarrassment etched on their faces for all to see. That, however, is not a great way to live and will in no way stop my face from getting red.

I have accepted the fact that I am awkward and that my cheeks betray me. I have accepted the fact that I embarrass myself on the regular. I know that I am being myself and that I have a brilliant smile that makes up for my uncomfy moments. I know that I am confident in my dorky self. This is the mentality that keeps me positive and happy. Ten out of ten I would most definitely recommend.