Day 70: “I’ll Be There For You”
When I turn on my tv
queue up “Friends”
and lay down on the couch,
it reminds me of a simpler time
coming home from school
watching the show with my mom
not understanding any of the innuendos
instead learning new words like
abysmal
except I thought it was a bysmal
like one bysmal
falling in love with the fashion
reluctantly agreeing that I’m a Monica
even though I always wanted to be a Rachel
now I’m proud to be a Monica
that’s growth
Day 69: “The Little Girl Who Couldn’t”
One thing about me
is I like to be unfair to myself
Well I don’t like to
But you’d think I do by how often I do it
Past me’s
are held to impossible standards
“You’re stupid,
Bad,
Terrible,
Because you didn’t know”
But what recently I learned, realized
is I couldn’t know
How would I know
if no one taught me
helped me
told me
So what was once tangible
Something I was on the cusp of
Should have
Done
Was now something impossible
Intangible
Far
Something I couldn’t have done
Which opens up the door for me
To forgive
Myself
Day 68: “Cosmic Questions to the Void”
Is it growing pains?
Or discontentment?
What’s the difference?
Is it being static?
Not moving?
Not growing?
Is that how you grow?
I don’t know what’s going on with me
Day 67: “Professional Tennis”
Watching them step on the court
Puts me in their shoes
Reminds me how much fun it is
To play
So I get back on the court
Watch the ball
Swing
Make contact
Yikes
That didn’t go where I wanted it to
Guess I can’t just pick up a racket and be Sabine Lisicki
Day 66: “Lorde & Savior”
I press play
Close my eyes
Breathe
I’m transported
to 2017
“Melodrama” CD blasting
Feeling new feelings
Maturing
Freeing
Enjoying the summer
For once
When I open my eyes
It’s not 2017
It’s now
Still hot as heck
But
Somehow I can tolerate the heat
When I’m listening to “Virgin”
I feel free
Fed
Awake
Confident
Grown
Alive
Capable
Cool
Lorde might just have saved my summer
Day 65: “The Last 50 Pages”
I finished my book
It was honestly kind of a letdown
I was gripped for 350 pages
But the last 50 wrapped up the story too quickly
Too easily
Like I’m glad everyone made it out okay
And that they fought against tyranny
And won
But like
Is it really that easy?
Day 64: “Staying Cool”
What repels sunshine?
Sunscreen
Umbrella
What repels heat?
Ice
Fan
But the sure fire way
Just don’t go outside
Day 63: “Reading”
I sit on my bed
Open up my book
And read
I close my book
Look around
I’m in a different world
Day 62: “Canker Sore”
I have a canker sore
A huge one
In the back of my mouth
Right side
It hurts
I showed my boyfriend
Opened wide and shined a flashlight
He said he didn’t even need the light
It’s that big
I get them when I’m stressed
Makes sense why I have one now
I need a break
A breather
Deep breaths
In
Out
In
Out
Maybe a couple days off will help
A day in bed
Staring at my phone
Is bound to do the trick
A nice long shower
Self care
There
The pain will magically go away
Day 61: “No Questions Today”
I’m going to try not to ask a question in today’s poem
I realized I do that often
As I’m thinking about what to write
I’m wondering
Questioning
And that wondering leads to something
And that something is a poem
But I want to challenge myself
No questions today!
Just writing
I guess I’m still inspired by questions
Just in a different way
What do you think of this questionless poem?
Dammit!
Faking It Made 